Archives for posts with tag: baby

Ughhhhhhhhh

I was super proud when we weaned tiny human back at 7/8 months. Before we had kids I had already formulated the opinion that dummies weren’t a necessity. Flash forward to tiny human at day three of life in our atmosphere, one tired mamma and one not sleeping baby fighting each other to not be the first to cry. The loveliest nurse points out that she’s a sucker. Her velociraptor tendencies had made nursing painful and I had to pump. Poor thing just wanted the comfort (well then, don’t go for meat on your first meal crazy babe). So we tried the dummy. It was a god send. And I hate myself for thinking otherwise back when I was with out child.

Indi only needed her dummy to get herself to sleep. She didn’t need it to calm down or for teething. I could pop that dummy in her mouth and she would drop her head to my shoulder and be ready for bed. When we got back from our holiday to bali we knew it was time. She was still a chilled out little babe, and we wanted to wean her before she became attached to it. And we did, with relatively no hassle at all. We were shocked at the ease of it all.

Then came the teeth. You all know I’m not a fan of the teething devil (evil little snot it is). We had months of teething symptoms with no signs of movement on the teeth front. Then bang! At she reached nine months and started screaming in her sleep. She was restless and nothing could soothe her. She was starting to walk so we were allowing for some lack of sleep. Its understandable that babes are restless when they are starting to develop. But this was so out of character. So we tried the dummy, thinking just once cant hurt. Automatic relief for tiny human. It is so hard to deny your little ones the things that gives them comfort, when you see the pain fade and they physically relax. You just want to help, so you give in. And give in we did.

Now at 10 months she has 5 teeth and looks like two more are on their way. It seems the dummy was needed for a reason. She will chew on the dummy for about 10 mins, then shes out to it. For the night. Most of the time I find it on the floor, thrown out of the cot at some stage through out the night.

Friday night we decided it was time to wean again. Stupidest idea ever. The kid is now attached. Saturday night she was cranky and grizzling and crying on and off for an hour. We would go in and calm her down, settle her if we could them try to put her down again. She would just work herself up and cry again. That is until she threw up. BAD MAMMA! Yeah, so if the fact that there is food stains all over the baby, her sleeping bag, her pajamas and the white (who buys white for babies anyway) sheets was not bad enough, the guilt of being the reason she puked certainly made me mother of the year material. I automatically caved. I got upset, made a giant fuss, cuddled and rocked and consoled (perhaps someone should have done that to me?). I snuggled with her on the couch, gave her the dummy then put her back in her bed to sleep. If you were wondering – everything in that last sentence is wrong according to the research.

So here we are are the starting point again. This time equip with a bit more research and preparing for the worlds biggest shit storm (Oh didn’t I tell you? Indi can chuck tanties now. When she cranks up you sure as hell know about it). I don’t know if we will be strong enough to tackle this over christmas, give me strength if we do. But before she turns 1 on the 10th of February, as the spaghetti monster as my witness I will have her weaned (unless another 5 teeth decide they want to all come out at the same time, then in that case I’ll just give her a handful of dummies, leave her with aidan and book myself a trip to bali for three weeks). Wish us luck.

Much love peeps xxx

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When I wrote the christmas project, I thought I was being hopeful. I had culled my list to ensure that time would be on my side. I was really worried that with the all the commitments we already have along with all the social commitments coming up that we wouldn’t have time to get through them all. Or even worse. That we wouldn’t be able to do them together.

Well pfffffffffttttttt to that. I’m owning that list. And along with all the other stuff like crazy crafting, baking, christmas catch ups, preparing for indi’s first chirstmas and mentally preparing for somebodies first birthday, its fair to say that I am due a break down any minute now.

Any way, back to the list.

  1. See the christmas lights in the city: done Little Bum barely noticed the lights due to the fact that the city is way popular for a whole lot of people she’s never seen before. Feeding her with all the busy happening around her was interesting to say the least.
  2. Indi to have her photo with santa: done Best. Photo. Ever. There was always two types of photos that could happen. The ‘not so phased’ photo where the child sits quite content. Or the ‘what the frick is going on’ photo, where the child freaks out. I wanted indi to do one extreme or the other. And boy, she did not disappoint. I love this photo beyond compare. Poor little thing, that photo is going to come out at every chance I get.
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  3. Christmas carols with friends: done One of my favorite traditions ever. However, I must note that tornado child can now walk, and like to help herself to food, and will put anything in her mouth. Carols is a picnic style event, with candles and drinks and cheeses and lots of people. It was fun, and I’m pretty sure I heard a christmas carol or two, but lets just say we were kept busy and leave it at that.IMG_3886
  4. Make sugar and spice cookies: done Maybe making them last longer than a day can be our next goal?
  5. Do a family christmas photo: Not yet, hoping to get a couple come christmas day. Tornado child is the one small issue. Maybe if I feed her enough food, she will be slightly bloated and sit still for about ten minutes? Or maybe I’ll just put yo gabba gabba on, that normally turns her in to a zombie.
  6. Visit the christmas section in myer (and try not to buy everything): done Incredibly overwhelming and dangerous to a 9 and a half month old that just wanted to be let loose. Ain’t never gonna happen kiddo, you are a destructo-baby.
  7. Put up the christmas tree (and try to save it from the crazy cat and baby): done It took tiny human 20 seconds to smash a glass ornament (considering we have never brought glass ones on account of a kitty with a dangle fetish, it was quite remarkable). Our tree is a pot plant (her name is Natasha, don’t ask, it just is ok) a heavy, less chance of tipping over pot plant, with a few sentimental ornaments on it. It also comes with an added feature – a protective play pen exterior. Indi hated the play pen after about a month, so the fact that I can use it for anything makes me fairly happy.
  8. Watch ‘Love Actually’ (Aidan’s tradition, special): done It was on tv the other night. We will still watch it together christmas eve,while wrapping presents. Well I will wrap and Aidan will snore. You know your jealous.
  9. Make baby painted wrapping paper (goobed with love): done (sort of) Pinterest failed me on this one. The recipe for ‘edible’ paint didn’t turn out very well, and that combined with an over eager daddy and a cranky baby resulted in lots of cleaning and some creative art works. IMG_4064
  10. Read christmas books (bit of a change from pooh, hairy mclary and ten little finger and ten little toes): done I even brought new ones to build this tradition, classic golden books. The books are a bit too long and Indi prefers to goob all over them, but atleast we are trying.IMG_3927IMG_3744
  11. Make Indi’s christmas stocking (key word there- make): In the process of this one. Unfortunately my imagination has got away from me, and what could be a relatively easy project has become crazy huge. Finding time to sew with the busy little tornado is not as easy to find now that she moves. I am determined. I will finish it. And when I do, I’ll gladly show off all my (stupid) hard work.
  12. Baby’s first christmas ornament (dreaming of this moment for the past 3 years): done This one was hard. Aidan and I didn’t like any thing. We even went to the chirstmas store (its on the road behind bunnings on leach Hwy, talk about too much christmas. I’m pretty sure christmas just threw up in that store and no body bothered to clean it up). So we brought a sweet little pink deer. I love it so much. Its just perfect. Thank you david jones for having sweet dainty little decorations for my baby girl.

So that is where we are at. One and a half things left to do on my list and still 9 days left. Christmas- come at me! I am soooooo ready for all your quirks and crazies.

Much love peeps xxx

DSC_0114 I must have blinked this month away, it has been busy and full and consuming. I nearly forgot to write this post. Mind you I forget all sorts of things lately. It seems a phone, two calendars and a diary just don’t cut it these days.

Ten months? I have no idea how to comprehend how it has been ten months. Or from another perspective, there is only two months until we celebrate tiny humans FIRST birthday. Technically that means I need to start party planning. I have waited with baited breath for this opportunity and already I am second guessing all my mental plans. Perhaps the hype in my head about this small milestone is a bit melodramatic? Time will only tell.

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In the last month I have watched tiny human step on the accelerator. Literally days after I wrote tiny human at 9 months, she started to make moves towards walking. She now does laps. She walks more than she crawls. She ‘runs’ to get away, she chases the cat. She is busy. Not much of the time spent walking is slow either, babe has a need for speed. Unfortunately her body cant keep up with her and the stats for face plants have been rising.

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Along with the increase in injury has come the increase of grizzles, sooks, tanties, sads and tears. This month we have seen our first ‘real’ tear. I had been a bit worried that she didn’t cry right from the beginning. We were told not to worry until she turned 6 months. Since then I have been on constant watch for any sign of a tear. When most families would rush to a crying babe, I would be the crazy mum tilting my baby over to look really closely into her eye. Just in case there was a little tear I might have missed. This month has brought us precisely 4 whole tears (four different occasions also). Yes I am proud. Damn proud actually.

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One reason for tears was the first official melt down (why dont they have a space for that in the baby book, along with first poo in a bath, first time screaming in a restaurant, first time eating cat food and first time throwing up out in public). The meltdown near broke my heart. I was caught off guard and really didn’t know how to react. I had taken her to the creche at the gym for the first time that morning. Expecting the worst I was pleasantly surprised when little bum barely even noticed I had left her. She continued to be a chirpy little thing all day, even when she skipped her afternoon nap. Come dinner time, she was being fed by Aidan (and fairly content to note). I was off to watch a movie with some friends, so like I do every time I go out, I gave her a kiss and told her that I loved her. I only reached the back door, then shit got real. I kid you not I thought she’d fallen out of the high chair she was howling so much. Nope just loosing her crap because mamma left. I tried to help Aidan calm her (note to the mammas out there – this was the dumbest thing to do in this situation, it makes everything so much worse for everyone involved. Will not make that mistake again). In the end Aidan told me to go, that he had it sorted. I got a text later saying that Indi refused to eat any more, the only way to calm her was to give her a bottle, she fell asleep during her bottle and was put to bed early. Poor little babe. But, as everyone keeps telling me, she’s going to have to get use to me leaving, otherwise there will be melt downs left right and centre.

Now the big one. TEETH. Its no secret that me and the teething devil are not friends. I have made many a promise, just for Indi to not have teething pain, and for our house to be sleep friendly again. Last month there was not a tooth peg in sight. I had secretly wished that if it was going to be like this they had better all come at the same time. Moral of this story? Be careful what you wish for. Looking at her gums yesterday she had three teeth, looking at them again today she has five. Yep, blink and you’ll miss it.

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Between the learning to walk, the tears, the injuries and the teeth, I am in constant state of awe. This child never ceases to amaze me. And that’s just the stuff I have time to notice. This coming month Indi will start to spend less time with me and begin to spend time with a nanny/sitter. Yes its time for this mamma and her babe to start working on their attachment issues. Stay tuned for updates (also known as ‘mamma cries in the car, parked around the corner’).

I want to say slow down, but my busy babe would not take any notice of me. I’m just making the most of being in these moments. Grow strong my little bum

Much love peeps xxx

A long, long time ago there was a young girl with gigantic unruly hair who lived just down the road from a young boy with braces who played hockey. High school sweethearts.

That was 13 years ago. My hair is still unruly, but not so big thanks to advances in hair treatments. Aidan’s braces went a long time ago, but hockey is still hanging around.

We have traveled to Malaysia, Mauritius, Bali and Thailand. We have lived in four different houses together. We are the proud owner of 1 diva cat. We got married and we had a baby. I completed a university degree and Aidan has finished an electrical apprenticeship. We are busy, lazy, annoying, cheeky, stupid, irritating, smart, clever, smiley, giggling, messy, poor (at times), drinkers, eaters, friends, partners and lovers. We are happy.

13 years together, almost 3 years married, almost 1 year with indi, it’s all just a little bit lovely.

Gigantic love up over here right now, sending it all out to you guys

Much love peeps xxx

My brain is super busy these days. I must admit it works a whole lot harder than the rest of my body combined, I’m lazy. It’s full of ideas, and memories, lists of things to do and things that should already be done. It’s like a traffic jam up there, so much happening nothing really making any moves.

My to do lists are crazy long. It’s this time of year, I just keep adding to my lists rather than crossing anything off. I’m trying to multi task to achieve things, but it’s no use I am constantly behind.

It’s horrible feeling like you need to catch up. Reminds me of being extremely slow at cross country during high school. Knowing everyone else had pretty much finished, and there I was plodding along. It felt like I was never going to finish. But I eventually did, and thankfully cross country was only once a year.

Catching up is a priority, I know that. But my ability to procrastinate is kicking in big time. I blame tv programmers. They keep putting Disney shows/movies on, everyone knows I’m a sucker for that crap. Then there’s tiny human, who is growing up so crazy fast in front of me. I feel like if I don’t stop and steal a moment with her, ill turn around and she will be 13, telling me she hates me and threatening to run away. On top of that, the inner Christmas elf in me is pinging out on dreams of tinsel and decorating, cookies and parties. But none of these things even closely relate to grocery shopping, merging super or cleaning the bathroom.

So how do I gets self sorted? Who knows?! Probably not by hanging out with my gorgeous friends and watching movies or checking Facebook a million times or even by deciding to have a nap when the baby sleeps (she sleeps all the way through, compared to ‘real’ mums I’m practically off my face on sleep most nights).

So my plan is to make a plan (also known as more procrastination). I’m going to plan out when I want to get all my ‘to do’ list done. As well as that I’m going to make a chore schedule (OCD much crazy lady?). I’d clean everything everyday given half a chance. And lately I am telepathically kicking my own arse for not getting even the simplest things done. At least if there is a schedule I can be realistic.

The biggest problem with all this is that I’m in part a perfectionist. Well sort of anyway. It’s more that I must think that I’m the only one who will do it the right way or do it properly so I put pressure on myself to get it done and done right. I hate asking for help, and have real issues when people offer help (nope, don’t do it, do not offer me help. I need to try to figure it out myself, go through all the motions. Then when I need help I will ask for it, but only then can you give it. Yep I know, utter loon over here).

So you can see I am my own rock and hard place. Whole lot of crazies in this bag. I aim to sort through all my crazies one day. But I can’t keep procrastinating right now, I’ve got a ‘to do’ list to conquer. Why are you distracting me?

Much love peeps xxx

Time is fleeting! Its just literally roaring past me at the speed of knots. I long to hold on to the day and savor it. To sit down and watch this little face as it is now. Taking everything in, discovering, exploring and learning. Tomorrow she will have grown again and it will feel furiously fast. I will ache for what she is today. This whole mum thing is making me notice every. single. little. change. I’ve noticed how much of her baby fat has disappeared since she’s started crawling. I miss seeing those little fat rolls. Uggghhhhh at this rate I’ll end up having another one just to relive each little moment.

9 months, almost as old out as she was in. Wow. Technically 18 months of being. Oh.My.God.

Crawling is fabulous, but realistically a complete pain in the arse. Indi loves it. Access to everything. She’s got some speed too. Her ‘get away’ crawl (which just happens to have a mischievous giggle that goes with it) has both Aidan and I picking up our pace. Lets just say the kid is lucky she’s god damn cute. She is officially danger! Do you need to baby proof your house? Let me bring Indi over. She will find EVERY dangerous area in your house, whilst ignoring the fun, baby friendly areas. She makes a bee line for the oven every time she gets anywhere near the kitchen (we’re teaching her that its a NO GO area even when its not on), cat food is a favorite play toy, sorry where you wanting to close the fridge? Well you cant, Indi is getting the beans out to play with. She loves to do her cross country training on the bricks out the back (majority of the time in the nude too), and is normally crawling after the cat even after she’s been swiped 5 or 6 times. The kid has no fear. Its exhausting.

We are way too close to walking than I can handle. She will walk herself along the couches, and loves to walk with you holding her hands. We gave in and brought her a walker last weekend. Straight away she walked it with out any assistance. She keeps increasing her free standing record too. I’m so not ready for walking. Not yet anyway.

She’s sort of said Dada. I think what she says counts, but Aidan’s not sold. She chats her head off tho. Babbling all sorts of sounds. Pretty sure she said watermelon the other day. Bam four syllable word! Totally not over exaggerating (just lying). If its not chatting its giggling or snuffling. The kid is not quiet that’s for sure.

Indi must have a black hole for a stomach at the moment. She just eats and eats and eats. I can’t comprehend how much goes in. No more baby food (mostly because that wouldn’t fill her up) she eats what we do. She has perfected the ‘are you gonna eat that’ look. Nothing on your plate, or in your hand is sacred anymore.

STILL NO TEETH! Uggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Teething is a complete poop! I can see that they are there, they just haven’t come out yet. I just want to see what all the grizzling, restlessness and sleepless night are happening for.

Might not be any teeth but there is hair. And its getting all swishy in the back (insert curly sue, shirley temple curl daydreaming here). I can run my fingers through it. I can brush it. I can part it. Can not wait to clip it. Don’t ask me where my crazy hair fixation has come from, I just really can wait for her to have hair (and then for her to learn to sit still while I braid it a million times).

Big thing this last month has been how little bum has begun to learn the art of ‘daddy manipulation’. I knew girls learnt this skill early (I was a master of the craft) but Indi is showing promising signs very early. Poor Aidan is battling with the ‘is something wrong’ and ‘what have I done wrong’. Indi gets her dad to things her way. Precious little diva.

Hugs are a big thing recently. Proper, squeezy hugs. The kind where breathing is a bit difficult due to the two little arms locked around your neck. It might be the attachment anxiety that comes with a 9 month old, but I’ll take those hugs any day.

We’ve started swimming lessons this last month too. Crikey this kid loves water. When we get to the pool she gets all excited just sitting in her pram. I can’t hold her until we are just about to go in because she will pull herself about to get out of my arms, don’t even think about putting her on the ground to get things ready. She would gladly take herself swimming if given half a chance. She emptied the watering can on herself last week and happily splashed away for a good half and hour until she was dragged away. When given the hose she instinctively put it over her head and then began to drink from it. All my worries about how well she would fare in the hot perth summer are officially over. No need to worry with this water baby.

She’s lost so much of her baby fat now that she’s on the move. Gone are those gorgeous chubby thighs, and her face has thinned out. She’s looking less and less like a baby and more like a little person. Looking back at photos I struggle to comprehend just how much has changed in 9 short months.

Much love peeps xxx

Dang, the kid just owns the camera. With the spring sun bringing some killer light, I just had to snap some shots of this little face.

My heart just blooms with pride when I see her little face.

Much love peeps xxx

I’m sorry (not sorry) about the early christmas post. Be aware I will more than likely post a million christmas things over the next few months. I’m a hot mess over the holiday season.

I get pretty crazy about Christmas. I love all of it. Buying presents, Christmas lights, wrapping gifts, festive food, traditions, Christmas carols, decorating the tree, sending cards, giving gifts, eating lots, Christmas parties, running out of sticky tape, spending time with family, races on Boxing Day, baking cookies, eating cherries- I could go on, but I think you get the point. I love it. I love Christmas.

Last year was pretty hard. Our first Christmas with out dad. It was like all the air had been sucked out of my Christmas balloon. So much of Christmas involved the things I use to do with my dad when I got to Albany.

Dad and I would make a point if going out, after dark and ‘obtaining’ a real Christmas tree. It wasn’t because we needed one. There’s always a plastic on inside the house. It was more about going to get it together.

We would also make a trip to the cherry farm to tree fresh cherries. If it was a rough cherry season we would go up to three times, to ensure we didn’t miss out.

We would go get prawns for christmas lunch, go fishing, buy gummy bears, watch lord of the rings (christmas tradition), listen to music on the back verandah, do big breakfast cook ups, I’d help dad pick presents for every one, take photos down at the beach, go surfing (mostly dad, I’d just listen to my ipod and read). So many memories.

Before you start thinking ‘sheesh she’s dribbling on about her dead dad again’ just hear me out. I want the same things for Indi. I want her to associate christmas with family. I want her to have things that she remembers doing with me, even when she’s an adult. It is kind of like me forcing a tradition on my poor unsuspecting daughter, but I’m good with that.

So how am I gonna do that? The christmas project. Aidan and I have complied a list of the things we love to do in December (christmas related). We dont normally make an effort to do them all every year, but being Indi’s first christmas (and also that she is too young to complain yet) we’re going to give it a go. I’m pretty dang excited!

The Christmas Project

My not so fabulous attempt a pinterest style christmas photo of Indi. The kid would not sit still. 250 shots, about 6 good ones. Might try again when she’s sleepy. Fingers crossed.

  1. See the christmas lights in the city
  2. Indi to have her photo with santa
  3. Christmas carols with friends
  4. Make sugar and spice cookies
  5. Do a family christmas photo
  6. Visit the christmas section in myer (and try not to buy everything)
  7. Put up the christmas tree (and try to save it from the crazy cat and baby)
  8. Watch ‘Love Actually’ (Aidan’s tradition, special)
  9. Make baby painted wrapping paper (goobed with love)
  10. Read christmas books (bit of a change from pooh, hairy mclary and ten little finger and ten little toes)
  11. Make Indi’s christmas stocking (key word there- make)
  12. Baby’s first christmas orniment (dreaming of this moment for the past 3 years)

I’m pumped, and this is just the official ’12 days of christmas’ list. There are a few other things we want to do to. What are your christmas tradition? Bocce with the grandies? Eating a hot roast? Midnight mass? Keep them strong, tradition leaves your loved ones with a sense of warmth when you cant be there to cuddle them. I’ll be watching lord of the rings just to feel my warmth this christmas.

Much love peeps xxx

It seems in the last week or so fear has squeezed its way into our little house hold. Having someone come into your house in the middle of the night can do that to you.

I’ve never been one to shy away from anything really. I will admit to over dramatizing and making a scene prior to the event, but 9 out of 10 times I’ll give it ago. I normally freak out, over think every possible outcome, psych myself up and then do it. I never really let on that I’m scared.

Right now?  I shitting myself at random noises (surprisingly enough staying completely still isn’t the most heroic move). If its at night I will panic whack Aidan and make him check it out. The worst part is I am sleeping so lightly now,  a week and a half on and I feel knackered from being ‘almost awake’ as apposed to ‘completely asleep’. I know I’m not exactly at the paranoia stage, but its a big enough change in routine for me to notice.

I’m not sure if tiny human has picked up on my vibe, but for the first time since she was born I’ve noticed she has become scared. Some might call it clingy or cranky, but to me its showing fear. In the past (almost) 9 months I’ve been able to pass her off to pretty much anyone for a cuddle. Family, friends, other mums, the lady behind the counter at the chemist, its never really phased her. Lately she will physically crawl away from someone and get upset if they get to close. She will hang on to Aidan or myself if we try to hand her to someone ‘new’ for a cuddle (new also refers to people she hasn’t seen in a week or two). I’m very aware that babies go through these phases, its natural, they are learning about relationships and boundaries. But this is a bit off. It also seems to correlate with the car being stolen and I’m worried my crazy freaking out mamma vibe has gotten to her.

If this is the case I’m gonna have to chill out, if she is picking up on this, then there is no saving her from all my other crazies.

Much love peeps xxx

When tiny human hurts herself she gets more upset that she has to stop what she was doing than for fact that she is in pain.

Nappy change time is now known as ‘rollover and run away butt naked, make mum chase me around with a nappy, stand up on something dangerous to give mum a chance to put nappy on, drop to the ground to show her that I’m in charge, crawl over to something else, stand again, let mum do up one side of the nappy, attempt to get away, do a double pike with a twist landing in a arabesque position, allow mum to finish putting the nappy on’ time.

The mail man, the garbage man, the delivery man – pretty much anyone who comes to visit that we don’t know ALWAYS comes when the baby is asleep and ALWAYS makes a racket. Despite the fact that I know nothing could wake Indi up if she’s already asleep, I find myself getting super pissed and threatening to beat the crap out of the the noisey bastards.

I want chocolate cake, for breakfast, everyday.

I think there is a ghost in our house. Indi always seems to be distracted by something that isn’t actually there. But this ghost must be hilarious, because she looses it giggling (which actually sounds more life a snuffly puppy at times). I think it might be my dad. I’d like that.

I hate curbside pick up. I’m pretty sure its the reason some butt hole broke into my house and stole my car. Curbside pick up gives a bunch of people from god knows where a reason to hang out in your neighborhood after dark. Now I’m not judging those who ‘vintage shop’ from the curbside. I think up-cycling somebodies pre loved goods is the best form of recycling. I have scored some sweet pieces from the verge boutique. I am just unlucky enough to be living close to a few wanky areas in Perth. Fancy area means fancy goods, fancy goods means more traffic, more traffic means increased chance of not so fabulous people hanging outside my house. Thankfully it will be gone soon. And then, I can sleep soundly.

White is officially not in season for 8 1/2 month olds. Watermelon, strawberry, spaghetti bog, casserole, sweet potato, stewed apples, blueberries, pumpkin – pretty much all foods have the ability to tie dye the shit out of a perfectly clean white onesie. Napisan is a house essential on a meal to meal basis.

I am ocd when it comes to toys. They need to be in a particular area in the lounge room. If indi pulls her books down, I’m more than happy to put the books back on the shelf. If she rips a magazine into pieces, I’ll put those pieces in the bin straight away. I like all the baby stuff in the car to be in its place. Its this staying at home business it makes me crazy neat freak.

Having not worked in a year, I’m shitting myself about going back to work. Shitting myself about making a call about going back to work. Terrified of being shit at what I considered myself to be bloody good at. Finding child care, organizing times, finding a balance, missing out on milestones, allowing someone else to get to know my baby, being behind on curriculum advances, new routines, making the sacrifices – its all freaking me out. How do mums do this? I need a pep talk people.

Is there anything more fabulous than fresh sheets?

It has been 11 months with out my Dad. My chest hurts just typing that.

Aidan is currently completing his final electrical exam. He started his apprenticeship when I completed my degree. Pretty dang proud of the boy. Only one more day.

Thats my brain. Sorry its boring as hell.

Much love peeps xxx

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